Dear Guy in the Lincoln Next to Me,

I like your car.  It’s old school – like my dad’s – sleek, clean, smooth.

I like your hair too – not at all like my dad’s – crisp, intricate cornrows.

But you make me sad because you’re unnecessarily courting death.

Here you are in this car you clearly take good care of, with a rocking braid pattern that obviously took some time and care, but you’re driving like you don’t care about your life.

Your unfastened seatbelt first caught my notice.  Next I noticed your cigarette, even before you began flicking ashes out your window.  Then, and this is what did me in, you pulled out your phone and held it to your face.  That left you with no hands to drive.  Your left hand dangled out of your window while your right hand positioned your phone between your mouth and ear.  I guess your alignment is really good, because you didn’t have your knees or anything on the steering wheel to keep the car straight as you accelerated.

Sir, driving without a seatbelt is dangerous.  Smoking is dangerous.  Using your phone while driving is dangerous.  Doing all of these things at the same time just means you’re seeking disaster.

Please care for your life as well as you care for your ride and your locks.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen