The other day on my way to work, I was driving on Kingshighway, as I always do, when two pedestrians walk out in front of me. They don’t have the light, and they aren’t even at an intersection. Of course I stop, however, because – pedestrians.
The one who’s walking slightly behind the other pulls out his penis and starts urinating while he’s crossing the street. I give him high marks for using a back and forth motion to arc his urine out in front of him in an effort, I can only assume, to keep his jeans and shoes dry. I also applaud his nonchalant attitude. He acted as if he daily has such an urge to urinate that he can’t wait until he’s across the street to go, so naturally, urinating and walking have become second nature to him.
Despite his mastery of the art of urinating while crossing a busy street during morning rush hour, I would have preferred not to have seen that.
Then the next day, I was driving on Kingshighway, as I am wont to do, when I see the neck of a guitar jut out of the driver’s side window of the car in front of me. Next thing you know, I see the driver’s hand on the frets, and he begins fingering notes. Yep. It seems the guy in front of me was playing the guitar while driving. Didn’t I mention that traffic was moving at a nice clip when this happened? No waiting until a stoplight for this intrepid musician. He needed to play the guitar, and he needed to do it right then.
I’m not sure what about morning madness on Kingshighway makes people experience a sense of urgency so strong that they cannot wait until safe and appropriate times to satiate their urges, but it sure does make for an interesting morning commute.